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Frozen
Rain
 It freezes
 It falls
 It’s no longer rain
 Not only is it frozen, 
 It freezes everything around it
 Destroying the path that once knew happiness
 Destroying the future that once knew joy
 Now it only knows ruins and pain
 But some see the beauty in this frozen wonderland
 Do you?

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This article has 5 comments.
i agree, it was kind of choppy haha, i just couldnt really get a rhythm though. i though ti sounded cool in my head, but i guess its hard for others to read it the same way you originally write it. but thank you so much! ill look at your stuff when i get time! =)
I liked it. You did a good job. If I can make a suggestion, I think to make it stronger, you could have added a bit of rhyming or rhythm to the phrases. It was chopping (and I like that style) but almost too cut up.
Overall, you did a really good job! Keep writing. You've got some amazing talent.
If you have time, it would mean a lot to me if you could take a look at some of my work. :)
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