Contemplating Thoughts | Teen Ink

Contemplating Thoughts

February 13, 2012
By AlexisNicole822 SILVER, Elyria, Ohio
AlexisNicole822 SILVER, Elyria, Ohio
5 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
Robert Pattinson: “If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are. Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads"


She sits quietly without any movement.
Desperately trying not to draw attention to herself.
People around her talk with enthusiasm,
but she’d rather sit and think about:


Pain and heartache, the battle she’s fighting.
Death and suicide, how she’s trying not to give in.
She’s a straight A girl, doesn’t give any trouble,
but at home she feels like she’s all alone.


She has one friend, the friend that left her.
Made her cry when she was hurt.
Name called and killed her inside,
to the point where she felt like dirt.


Her father hurts her, in a mental way.
She shies inside and just smiles at him.
Forced to live a person that died in her head.
But she just shrugs and lives lies instead.


She’d rather cry softly when music blares.
So no one hears her failing attempts,
to end her life and not live again.
No one cares to look past her mask.


She acts really happy, and sometimes she’s okay.
But lately it’s hurting, she sees darkness every day.
Her heart is burning, there are probably scars,
to show the fight she’s struggling.


She’s felt love, but had it snapped like a twig.
Watched her father drink away his sins.
Loved her mom with her very being,
but maybe to live was not worth doing?


There is no answer,
she scuffles through it all the time.
To give up and end her life,
or to sit back and watch it fly by?


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