My identity, lost in a pillar of smoke,
Made up, of giving up and lost dreams and silent screams!
Your still, my will, to go on, and be strong,
And without you there’s nothing …
Putting on fake smiles,
Painting my face, to hide my disgrace,
And cover up the lies,
That lie still in the flames of my fire, I become a liar, burning…
You are me as I am you,
But you so far away, lost on a journey across the states,
What is left of me? Or should I say we?
Since us two, were stitched together with the same glue,
And I am you as you are me…
Selling my body for pennies and nickels,
My strength is fickle.
Trying to hide but nowhere to run,
Who the f*** have I become? No One! No Reason left to fight…
Destroying the body you saw, when I was raw, when I was real!
As beautiful, and wonderful, and innocent,
How would you feel? Whispered, “I love you’s” in the dark of the night…
I become weak,
Meek and broken with no words to speak,
From my tattered lips, desired hips,
Used and forgotten as if I were worthless…
Finding comfort in all the wrong places,
Climbing out of dirty sheets and back seats,
Just to face the accusatory faces,
And once we’re done he’s gone in a flash,
Never even looking back; this world is ruthless…
As I retract deeper and deeper into a corner,
Nothing left to give,
Overshadowed by the life you think I live,
Sitting much too numb to cry…
Bewildered and confused,
Feeling neglected and abused, as I long for him,
Rendered silent by my pride.