I long for the day I see you again. And I've been through the rain and long train rides, in hopes to find you and let you know whats been on my mind. Like how you were so vane, and used to drive me insane whenever you put the blame on me. And the pain has lasted for months at a time. And whenever I hear your name, it feels like bells chiming in my ears, making me light headed. And though you left me in the middle of a staircase, I tell everyone you left me in the rain, because it actually felt like a hurricane hit me in the face at such a fast pace, because I was drowning. You fixed what was broken, but left me so misspoken and lowered me. You made me feel small that winters day in fall, but all in all you made me feel worthless. I remember that day so clear, because everything near to me began to disappear. I remember you handed me a plastic bag full of my things like magazines I read, like the one everyone saw that claimed Lil Wayne was dead. The bag consisted of about twenty bobby pins, that must've fallen onto your bed. But I know back at your home there are probably more, because knowing how many bobby pins I lose, there are probably three or four lying on your bedroom floor. And I guess you were like a bobby pin, because I lost you too. Because you were gone out of the blue, which was something I really had no clue was going to happen, considering how tightly you were glued to my scalp. But anyway, the main thing I want you to know is that I told you secrets. Because I thought you fix me and help me grow, but I never expected you letting me go. I'm torn, stressed and a little depressed, but I didn't think that would scare you. I mean I guess I understand, because sometimes I scare me too. But the fact that you lied and denied the fact that you ever loved me.... Well then again, maybe you never did love me. I mean I get it; I guess I have my flaws, like how I always really need some sort of applause. Like the fact that I get lazy, or maybe I'm a little bit too obsessed with Martin Scorsese, and your abstinence used to make me go crazy; but I really just needed someone. Someone to stay by my side, and be there when I'd start to subside, and whenever I'd start to break down and cry. Someone I can trust, and help me go through the simple things I can't do on my own. And show me sides of you no one else has really ever known. But I guess everything is over now, and it's time to move along. For you it was only 3 month, but for me it's still going on. And I know this feeling will never die so here is my letter to you, letting you read my feelings and recognize the impact on me you never really knew.