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Internal Death
Can I just tell you how stressed I am?
How worried I am for my life?
How depressed and concerned,
Petrified and afraid I feel.
How scared I am to be alive?
To be in the same room as you is to
Sign my own death warrant.
Ten feet away is twelve feet too close.
Being afraid to say how I feel.
I’m scared to death to be alone.
I’m worried and afraid,
Sometimes I can’t breathe.
But here you are spreading lies.
Does it not bother you that
You’re trying to ruin my very being, my life?
You used to love me,
Or was that a lie too?
Because I believed I loved you as well.
I guess I didn’t but it doesn’t
Matter now, because I can’t look at you anymore!
So now can I just fade away
Like I used to do when I was young?
Can I just part into molecules?
Wave goodbye to the world
As I once knew it?
Can I just say goodbye to everyone,
Bat my eyelashes and have never existed?
Can I just blow a kiss, and there I go?
Or am I forced to sit here
In awe- and witness my internal death?
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