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Sparrow Song

July 9, 2014
By --Em-- GOLD, Grand Rapids, Michigan
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--Em-- GOLD, Grand Rapids, Michigan
15 articles 0 photos 32 comments
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I wake every 'morn
to a lovely melody
rising to the clouds
and floating through
my open window.
Alarm clocks are so overrated.

© Sarah A., Escondido, CA

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 11 comments.

EmmaClaire0823 GOLD said...
on Sep. 23 2014 at 9:02 pm
EmmaClaire0823 GOLD, Bay Minette, Alabama
13 articles 0 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Be the change you wish to see in the world.&quot;

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I really love the poem and the last line except for the word overrated. Everything else works and flows in my opinion, except that word. It sounds so harsh and bitter almost in a poem that inspires beauty. Great job with the creativity of the poem also.
violawritermady BRONZE said...
on Aug. 8 2014 at 1:37 pm
violawritermady BRONZE, Lehi, Utah
3 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;The true artist does not create art as an end to himself. He creates it for others; humanity is the goal.&quot; -Bronislaw Huberman

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Loved this one! The way the last line pops out at you is such a neat thing. I totally agree with this poem, and I think it's simply great! 
MalaikaJ GOLD said...
on Aug. 5 2014 at 1:05 pm
MalaikaJ GOLD, Cloquet, Minnesota
19 articles 2 photos 127 comments

Favorite Quote:
I love writing. I love the swirl and swing of words as they tangle with human emotions. - James Michener

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I like the the whole thing! The last line doesn't seem to fit as well, but I think it gives it a funny and satisfying ending. Great job!
Rebecca97 BRONZE said...
on Jul. 25 2014 at 9:25 pm
Rebecca97 BRONZE, Gainesville, Florida
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments
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I like the fact that the last line of the poem seems almost out of place at first. It's as if someone were snapping their fingers in your face, demanding your attention. It interrupts the flow, yet at the same time turns the entire poem on its head. Long explanation short, I actually really love the last line and the effect it has on the entire poem. =)
Longlegs GOLD said...
on Jul. 24 2014 at 7:10 am
Longlegs GOLD, Greeneville, Tennessee
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The last line doesn't seem to fit. But other than that, it's a very lovely poem with a unique tune. Even though it's so short.
CosmoPhoenix PLATINUM said...
on Jul. 22 2014 at 10:01 am
CosmoPhoenix PLATINUM, Kochi, Kerala, Other
28 articles 5 photos 31 comments

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I like the tune of the poem. Though it is just a few verses, I think your take on it is great. Good job!
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM said...
on Jul. 17 2014 at 10:18 pm
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM, Portland, Oregon
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This is a good poem, but I feel that the final line doesn't really work. It ties up the poem, but in a very incongruous way. I think it would fit better if the poem were longer and had more of a chance to establish a rhythm and a tone. Great job anyway though!
CheesePie BRONZE said...
on Jul. 17 2014 at 2:08 am
CheesePie BRONZE, Princeton, New Jersey
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It's a great poem :) Usually I don't really like free verse but this one has a lighter and funnier feel to it than most
. said...
on Jul. 16 2014 at 8:20 am
I'm normally averse to poems as short as this, but I absolutely loved this one. It's so beautiful, especially the last line that really ties it all together.
Olivia-Atlet ELITE said...
on Jul. 14 2014 at 1:54 pm
Olivia-Atlet ELITE, Dardenne Prairie, Missouri
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I can imagine the sparrow calling out to you! I love this :)
Ariel_Fluffyy SILVER said...
on Jul. 13 2014 at 10:12 pm
Ariel_Fluffyy SILVER, Los Angeles, California
7 articles 0 photos 54 comments

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This is beautiful