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Sparrow Song
July 9, 2014
I wake every 'morn
to a lovely melody
rising to the clouds
and floating through
my open window.
Alarm clocks are so overrated.
© Sarah A., Escondido, CA
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JOIN THE DISCUSSION
This article has 11 comments.
violawritermady BRONZE said...
on Aug. 8 2014 at 1:37 pm
Loved this one! The way the last line pops out at you is such a neat thing. I totally agree with this poem, and I think it's simply great!
I like the fact that the last line of the poem seems almost out of place at first. It's as if someone were snapping their fingers in your face, demanding your attention. It interrupts the flow, yet at the same time turns the entire poem on its head. Long explanation short, I actually really love the last line and the effect it has on the entire poem. =)
CosmoPhoenix PLATINUM said...
on Jul. 22 2014 at 10:01 am
I like the tune of the poem. Though it is just a few verses, I think your take on it is great. Good job!
BrightBurningCampeador PLATINUM said...
on Jul. 17 2014 at 10:18 pm
This is a good poem, but I feel that the final line doesn't really work. It ties up the poem, but in a very incongruous way. I think it would fit better if the poem were longer and had more of a chance to establish a rhythm and a tone. Great job anyway though!
. said...
on Jul. 16 2014 at 8:20 am
I'm normally averse to poems as short as this, but I absolutely loved this one. It's so beautiful, especially the last line that really ties it all together.
Olivia-Atlet ELITE said...
on Jul. 14 2014 at 1:54 pm
I can imagine the sparrow calling out to you! I love this :)
Ariel_Fluffyy SILVER said...
on Jul. 13 2014 at 10:12 pm
This is beautiful
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