Reconciliation with Joey | Teen Ink

Reconciliation with Joey

January 22, 2015
By Ashesfalldown GOLD, Groveland, Massachusetts
Ashesfalldown GOLD, Groveland, Massachusetts
18 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Imperfection is beauty... Madness is genius..." -Marilynn Monroe


I lost myself on July 28th 2014.

Everything I knew, everything I loved. My everything;

It all came crashing down.

Up until that point, 

I was good at pretending to be okay.

I guess a pretty face and a smile is all you need to fool people.

That's what I used to survive.

Until,

I turned around and saw my parents' blank faces.

Staring at me with a solemn look.

It was like a sad photograph; the old fashioned kind.

"Who died?" I asked jokingly.  I didn't know. Yet.

Tears started streaming from their eyes.  

And they told me.

It.Was.Him.

A wave of confusion came over my eyes,

As I tried to add it all up.

But I didn't know what.

It couldn't be him, no,

He had told me, "I love you," that very same day,

But what I didn't know was heroin stood in the way,

Of who he truly was, and who he was pretending to be,

And I was too blind to see,

the drug was his way to let out the pain.

So I stepped outside into the summer rain.

And I ran, and I screamed, and I cursed his name.

For making me part of his f***ed up game.

And all I wanted to do was run and run and run away.

Away from the pain, and sometimes I still do.

But I am trying to come to terms with my life, and everything.

That has happened.  

I forgive him and I forgive myself.

Because I knew, where ever he is, he is proud.

Of the woman I am, the woman I want to be.

But I still wish he was here with me.


The author's comments:

The heroin epidemic is not only a major problem that has been haunting the U.S for the past few months, but has also personally haunted my own life.  I lost my boyfriend, Joey, this summer.  It has been so hard, he was barely 19, and I've gone through all the stages of grief, trying to come to terms with my loss.  I'm finally trying to accept fate, learn from his mistakes, and remember the good in him.


Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 0 comments.