It’s these thoughts.
These words in my brain.
That send my emotions
in a spiraling descent down.

So far down that I
can’t even see the light anymore.
As if someone slipped a blindfold on me.

These thoughts send me
into a cascading waterfall of unhappy times.
These thoughts aren’t able to get pushed away.
They keeping running back at me, full force.
I feel the drops of rain fall from my eyes
and I taste the salt of tears on my cracked, dry lips.

I scratch at myself
and scream and cry because I’m angry
and upset.

No one knows so I stand alone,
suffering,
aching.

I can feel my heart beating in my chest,
and one by one the strings break.
I feel my body colliding with the floor.

My breath is heavy and my lungs ache.
But I continue in this rage.
I can’t stop.

I need someone to rescue me,
to tell me it’s okay.
But I no one knows I struggle.

I stay so far from the facts they’re untouchable.
I pray for the light to return.
I pray for these horrible thoughts to subside.

But they hold me down with the weight
of a thousand bulls.
My everything aches, my heart, my head.
The thoughts get worse.

I’m still on my knees and I can’t get up.
The little things I notice drive me insane.
I scream so loud you can hear the echo,
from above the hole I am trapped in.

“Please! Someone, help me!”
I scream again but no voices are heard
but my own echo.

Silence greets me.
I shake it’s hand and rest my head on the floor.
My heartbeat slows and my headache turns
into a slow, dull throb.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
Because silence came to greet me.
I was rescued by silence.