I thought I knew
when I woke up in the morning
claimed by the demons
of those other people.
I thought I knew love
when I was in my deepest
of sorrows and holes.
I thought I knew who I was
when I was with them.
I thought I knew what I needed
and wanted, but I didn't
I thought I knew what true love
felt like.
I was surely wrong.
Little did I know
I needed to be in
a destructive, deceitful
relationship
to KNOW
I have love you all of my
life.
I've some how known I needed you in my life.
I've somehow known
your touch would make me feel the safest.
I've somehow also known
that you would feel as low as I do
as a human being.
Feel like I've made too many mistakes.
But were only human.
Feel like were not up to expectations.
But we can really only do what we expect of ourselves.
Feel like were the lowest of the low.
When were not really that bad.
Feel like were being succumbed to
the lowest darkness of our demons.
Need be rid of ourselves.
Were nothing
worthless, useless.
But we found each other when
we were in the tangling
emotions and grasps of our minds
and managed to slowly untangle them.
With love.
And passion.
I thought I knew how all of this would feel.
4 years ago I thought I was in love.
I thought I was grown.
I thought I could fight everything.
Alone.
I thought I knew how to
survive.
But I didn't know I needed someone to grow with.
Be grown with.
SURVIVE THIS WRETCHED WORLD
together.
I didn't know that I could
ASK
for someone to help fight
my demons.
I didn't know I could Love like this.
I didn't know at all.
Every cell in my body
stands to attention.
Every nerve in my body
vibrates faster than the naked eye could see.
Every tear I could have thought to cry
shrivels like a slug under a blanket
of salt.
Every insecurity
gets dragged away with every happy emotion I have.
And is demolished.
Every bad thing that could have happened to me.
I had you by my side.
I've had you by my side.
I thought I knew I could love like this.
I thought I already did.
Oh boy was I wrong.
I thought I knew.
And now I know.
How to love every good and bad thing about a person.
Now I know.