I want to be happy.
Please do not assume I do not
because I always seem to be sad.

I want to be happy more than anything
in this world.
I want to be happy, not just temporarily.
I want happiness that lasts.

Sadness that crushes your bones
and squeezes your heart hurts.
It hurts like the crushing of a pounding headache.
Concrete has settled
in my bones.
Poison has settled
in my brain.

I love sadness.
I know that’s pathetic to say,
but when happiness is unknowable,
I find comfort in that sadness.
It hurts like the pain of a broken heart,
but like a broken heart,
it hurts even more to pick up the pieces.

I’m like a bird.
I have wings, but I do not fly.
I can; I know I can.
Still my wings lay by my sides.

I want to fly;
I want to be happy.
Please do not assume I do not
because I always seem to be sad.