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Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.

© Anonymous

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 2183 comments.

Lady! said...
on Jan. 30 2010 at 6:03 pm
Lady!, Fonda, New York
0 articles 0 photos 8 comments
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I like it. At first the ending confused me but, when I read it again and looked deeper I understood it. Good job!
AMCLRIDCA PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 29 2010 at 7:18 pm
AMCLRIDCA PLATINUM, CDA, Idaho
31 articles 2 photos 226 comments

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Good poem... I like the last part....
sMiLeY13 SILVER said...
on Jan. 29 2010 at 9:04 am
sMiLeY13 SILVER, Grand Junction, Michigan
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Favorite Quote:
My favortie quote is------- "Hey whats up" and also "facil" which means easy in spanish

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THIS REMINDS ME OF ME AND MY DAD
Arian3807 said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 8:24 pm
wow!!!

i love it

its amazing
Lonesoldier GOLD said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 8:17 pm
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that was a really good poem!!!!!
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on Jan. 28 2010 at 7:59 pm
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This is really good! I especially like the ending :) i like how not everything is not understood at once, kind of like the way it is when you're a kid. :D
Skeezics GOLD said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 7:39 pm
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I really liked this poem. It was well written and the emotion in it is something that is very powerful.
Prosaic-Scriptor BRONZE said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 6:16 pm
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Only thing that turned me off was the "gazed at the birdie." The tone really threw me for a loop...
MorrighanPoe SILVER said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 4:12 pm
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One of the reasons I like it is that the format reminds me of my own poetry. if you'd like to check my work out, it's posted on TeenInk.
MorrighanPoe SILVER said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 4:11 pm
MorrighanPoe SILVER, Crystal, Minnesota
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To be quite honest, not sure what it's about, but sometimes it's better that way. Great work, love the rhyme and rhythm!
Love~the~LORD<3 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 1:37 pm
Love~the~LORD<3 BRONZE, Vernon, Alabama
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Same here my friend
malgal3 SILVER said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 12:30 pm
malgal3 SILVER, Uhrichsville, Ohio
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Yeah, well I'm not going to lie either, YOU are weird my friend.
Sync. GOLD said...
on Jan. 27 2010 at 10:17 pm
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WOW!
This is perfect, it captured my heart and i sure as hell dont want it bck ths poem is soo great
i would appreciate it if you could look at some of my work expesually the latest one called minus a helping hand and give your oppinion :)
ColorsofChaos13 SILVER said...
on Jan. 27 2010 at 6:18 pm
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Wow, that's so intense, i love it for all it's darkness.
AbbyQ PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 26 2010 at 11:14 pm
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Really? come on. keep it clean, guys.
Nickel BRONZE said...
on Jan. 26 2010 at 4:57 pm
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this is really good
Sissybug2012 PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 25 2010 at 7:03 pm
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wuts wrong with it? its so creepy that its good.....
aquamarinalin said...
on Jan. 25 2010 at 9:16 am
I really like this poem, it reminds me of when I was a kid.
Keenan BRONZE said...
on Jan. 25 2010 at 8:26 am
Keenan BRONZE, Dennison, Ohio
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I'm not going to lie, it was a little weird. Especially the title. Wow...
alexc25 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 25 2010 at 8:26 am
alexc25 BRONZE, Uhrichsville, Ohio
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WOW! this poem is creepy