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Daddy's Womb MAG
April 23, 2008
i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.
So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.
i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.
The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.
i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.
i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.
© Anonymous
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This article has 2183 comments.
witchwallow said...
on Dec. 10 2014 at 5:12 pm
Beautifull. I look forward to more of your work.
Ashley Korin said...
on Dec. 9 2014 at 7:23 pm
I think you're right here. Father and sea were both capitalized,while "I" was not. This was probably to elaborate on how he was viewed as the least important, and smallest entity in the poem.
KaylieJ said...
on Dec. 9 2014 at 7:05 pm
Obviously I can't be sure, since I'm not the writer of this poem, but I feel like he used the lack of capitalization as emphasis on the way his father belittles him. I mean, clearly it was not laziness; he capitalized other words like "Son" multiple times throughout. So there must have been a reason for capitalizing in the way that he did.
Jackson1997 GOLD said...
on Dec. 9 2014 at 3:22 pm
This poem is sub-par
dylan rittenhouse said...
on Dec. 5 2014 at 1:30 pm
it was good story
Brainiac said...
on Dec. 4 2014 at 9:39 pm
I really enjoyed reading your poem! Your word choice and phrasing were excellent. One reccomendation would be to capitolize the "I's"- I found this editing error to be slightly distracting, and it took away from your otherwise awesome poem!
Kookie_monster29 BRONZE said...
on Nov. 24 2014 at 11:19 am
That was so pretty!
WindRunner GOLD said...
on Nov. 18 2014 at 1:00 pm
I feel like it was a betrayal of trust. What a father should want for a child.
WindRunner GOLD said...
on Nov. 18 2014 at 12:58 pm
I got angry as I read the end of the poem. They say freedom is life. No one should be restricted like that!
Freshatilly BRONZE said...
on Nov. 17 2014 at 11:04 am
DEEP
Briseida25 SILVER said...
on Nov. 17 2014 at 10:33 am
I love this poem.
poemoheart866 PLATINUM said...
on Nov. 13 2014 at 4:56 pm
This was a lovely poem and I enjoyed it very much so!
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Favorite Quote:
For god loved the world that he has given us his only beloved son <br /> <br /> John 3:16